What does it mean to really love your self? So much could be said on that subject! For me it involves taking care of my self and believing the best about who I am. It means seeing myself from the standpoint of love, not from a place of perfectionism or self-judgement.

When I think of self-judgment, I think of it as viewing the self mostly in a critical way. When we self-judge, we are looking at the pros and cons of who we are. But what if our opinion of ourselves is skewed. Take a moment and think of a few words you would use to describe yourself. That’s usually a good way to discover how you view yourself.

Sometimes I hear people speak poorly of themselves, putting their self down and belittling their accomplishments. They think it’s wrong to self promote or speak well of themselves. Recognizing who you authentically are and what is beautifully true about you is vital to learning how to love yourself. Many times it will involve disempowering the voice of the critic - what that has been your own inner critic or the voices of others acting as the outer critic. When we know our true identity then we can live out life in that way!

Some of us grew up in homes that weren’t the most loving or affirming environments. It’s then even easier to grow up believing things about ones self or about life that just aren't true. Until a new mindset is developed and inner healing is found the limiting beliefs carried from childhood will stick around. This isn't necessarily bad, but it can stunt us in certain ways.

You may think you didn’t have it too bad as a kid. Whether it’s denial, comparison, or empathy towards your caregiver, you might be thinking your childhood wasn’t too bad.  I think it's valuable to recognize that if we don't get what we need emotionally in childhood we can grow up into emotionally immature adults. Just as receiving harsh treatment is damaging, not receiving the affirmation or love we need as a child is also very damaging. Abuse and neglect are both very traumatic and emotional abandonment is devastating! Sometimes love is present but uncomfortable emotions still aren’t welcome. There are so many people I’ve spent time talking, all who had childhood experiences that caused trauma. Childhood experiences still affect us into adulthood. Without nurturing and reparenting the inner child you may feel stuck. Perhaps you don’t like yourself, or you face depression and anxiety day in and out. It may even be you lack the ability to what you’re feeling. No matter where you are there is hope for brighter days ahead!

For a decade and a half I have been on a very intentional journey of transformation from the inside out. I love seeing the progress I've made and continue to make. It's so satisfying to walk through a familiar situation and feel totally different in it, and it’s available to you too!!